Saturday, November 13, 2010

Canada's National ...

All countries use symbols, animals, or songs to identify themselves as. They acquire a list of things that exemplify and stand for their country: a national anthem, animal, food dish, etc. Commonly, a country will pick a strong series of objects to symbolize their country.

Curious, I decided to look up Canada's national symbols and see what they stood for. We already touched upon the national anthem, so here's what else I found:

When you think of a national animal, you think of something strong and inspirational. The US has the Eagle- a strong and independent creature that flies. It represents strength and freedom. Brazil has the jaguar- it's fierce and cautious. 

Canada has two national animals. The first one is the Beaver. Uhhh, okay. Why would they pick the second largest rodent to be their national animals? The reason for it is because it helped develop Canada via the fur trade. 
So basically, by picking the Beaver, it emphasizes how Canada likes to exploit innocent creatures for personal gain. 
Probably realizing what a fail it is to have a Beaver symbolize their country, they decided to add another national animal- the Canadian horse. I don't know if you have ever seen one, they are usually styling a mountie, but it's like the weener dog of all horses. 

The national food of Canada is Poutine. Poutine is a slang term for mess. And if you have never seen it, it looks like throw up. It's french fries smothered in gravy and cheese curd. Aside from looking revolting, I've heard it's actually quite delicious.

The national bird is a great northern loon or a common loon, which, ultimately looks like an average duck. It's clumsy on land due to the location of its legs, and nonetheless, enhances the clumsiness of Canadians (why do you think they say sore-ree so much). 

The Maple Tree is their national tree. This is largely attributed to one of their few sources of incomes- maple syrup.

Overall, they get an F for national symbols.

I honestly believe the Canadian government got together, got drunk off their ass drinking Molson Canadian whilst watching the Habs verse the Leafs. They then said, "We're all here, eh? How aboot we make the Beaver our national animal? And while we're at it, eh, let's put a maple leaf on our flag? That'll show every other country how important we are, eh? Eh bartender, how aboot another beer while we watch some puck?"


  1. Are you kidding me? and I'm going to guess that your from somewhere OTHER then Canada?! Why don't you give me the place you're from and if you want I'll just go around trashing your home country on a website like this... correction a website BETTER then this. Seriously if you got nothing nice to say just keep it to yourself. A lot of people would appreciate that!

    1. America. Go Ahead, I really don't care. And just so you know, the disclaimer at the bottom of the page notes the fact that this blog is simply a joke and I actually love the country. If you wrote stuff like this about America I would love to read it.